The Art of the Hair and a Palm Beach Gossip Tale
Book: How to Get Rich
Author: Donald J. Trump (with Meredith McIver)
e-ISBN: 1-58836-410-0
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After chapters on deals, branding, and beauty pageants, Trump pivots to something lighter. Hair gossip. Then a full Palm Beach morality tale. It is one of the weirder stretches in the book, and honestly one of the more entertaining ones.
The art of the hair
Once The Apprentice hit, Trump’s comb-over became national news. New York magazine called it a “pompad-over.” The Times said it needed an architecture critic. Letterman and Leno made it a nightly bit. Matt Lauer told him to shave it off. Pat O’Brien agreed.
Trump’s response: it looks fine to him, he has combed it this way for years, and maybe the ratings would drop if he changed now.
He denies wearing a wig. “No animals have been harmed in the creation of my hairstyle.” He admits he might wear one if he went bald. Men are vain, he says. Random House paid him to write a chapter on hair, so here we are.
His secret for neat hair: he barely faces the elements. He lives in Trump Tower, takes an elevator to work, and spends his time in limos, jets, helicopters, or Mar-a-Lago. On golf courses he wears a hat with a big TRUMP logo. Free advertising.
He also colors his hair. The result never looks great, he admits, but he hates gray.
The Joy Behar subplot is petty and funny. She kept insisting he wore a wig on The View, so he showed up, ran his hand through his hair, and ended the argument. Then on Leno’s show she attacked him again while the rest of the cast praised The Apprentice. Trump calls her talentless with a terrible accent. Being nice to some people never pays off, he says.
Gossip: the Palm Beach tale
Trump promises wisdom and advice in the book, but readers also want gossip. He delivers.
A rich married friend was rumored to be having an affair with a gorgeous married businesswoman. Trump did not buy it. The woman could have had anyone. His friend was not Brad Pitt, though he was rich.
Then the friend invited Trump to dinner with the couple. Trump told him it sounded uncomfortable given the rumors. The friend confirmed the affair. The husband did not know. Trump warned Melania the evening would be wild.
At dinner, tension filled the room. Leaving, Trump’s friend grabbed the woman around the waist in a familiar way. Over the following weeks, the friend called constantly, proclaiming love. Melania asked why. Trump explained.
The friend played Trump an answering machine tape. Intimate messages in a voice Trump recognized. No more doubt.
Then everything blew up. The husband threatened to kill the friend. The woman cut contact, saying her husband would tell Trump’s friend’s wife everything. The wife found out anyway.
Months later, the woman confronted Trump at a gallery. She denied the affair and accused him of spreading rumors. Trump thought she was one of the greatest salespeople he had ever met. If he had not heard the tape, he would have believed her.
The twist: the friend’s wife blamed Trump for the whole thing. She thought he introduced them. She told her husband that if he ever spoke to Trump again, she would divorce him. The friend stopped returning Trump’s calls.
Trump says his friend used him as a scapegoat. He would have played along if asked. “Look, I have a problem. Can I blame it on you?” The friend never made that call.
Now they see each other at events and say nothing. Trump heard the friend bought his wife jewelry to reconcile. She made him return it because it was not big enough.
What I take from this
The hair chapter is vanity as brand management. The gossip chapter is loyalty, denial, and blame shifting among rich people in a small town.
Trump tells both stories without much self-reflection. That is the point. He is giving you what he promised: advice, wisdom, gossip, and a glimmer of fame.
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